My wife and I have both faced the emotionally challenging task of placing three of our four parents in a care facility. We learned firsthand that the need for extended healthcare can happen to anyone, at anytime, and without warning. One evening we received a call from my sister informing us that my mother was in the hospital after having a stroke. Mother was 84, in relatively good health, but lived alone. After the stroke, she was not able to continue living by herself. We tried to keep her at home as long as possible, but caregiving proved to be overwhelming, and we were forced to place her in a facility.
My wife’s parents also needed extended healthcare. Parkinson’s disease incapacitated my father-in-law, and a hip replacement that did not heal as expected left my mother-in-law disabled. He didn’t know it at the time, but my father-in-law gave me the idea to become involved in extended healthcare planning as a career. When my wife and I moved my in-laws from the home they had lived in for 40 years, my father-in-law said to me, “I sure wish we had planned for this.” Neither he nor my mother-in-law wanted to relocate to a facility, and additionally he was worried that all their hard-earned lifetime savings would be used to pay for care. Both parents died in the facility, having used all but $2,000 of their estate.
When my wife and I reflect upon these experiences, two issues stand-out above all others. First, as it relates to Medicare, doctors, hospitals and insurance companies, the task of managing the paperwork is frustrating and extremely time-consuming. The role of a caregiver can be an exhausting experience, both emotionally and physically...and the thought is…Lord, give me the strength to get through another day.